May 2008
An Opportunist’s Tale
A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.
Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?”
“About 35,” was the reply.
“I’m actually 47,” the man says happily.
A little while later he goes to McDonald’s for lunch and asks the order taker the same question, to which the reply is, “I’d guess that you’re 29?”
“Nope, I am actually 47.” He’s starting to feel really good about himself.
While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question.
She replies, “I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a man’s age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your penis for ten minutes I will be able to tell your exact age.”
As there was no one else around the man thought what the hell and let her slip her hand down his pants.
Ten minutes later the old lady says, “OK, it’s done. You are 47,”
Stunned the man says, “That was brilliant! How did you do that?”
The old lady replies, “I was behind you in McDonald’s”.
HASSAN ASKARI,A BANGLADESHI HONORED BY CONGRESS AND PRES. BUSH
A CAPITOL GAIN FOR MUSLIM TRAIN HERO
January 24, 2008 — WASHINGTON - The Brooklyn Muslim who defended a group of Jewish subway riders after they were allegedly attacked for saying “Happy Hanukkah” last month will get an all-American reward next week - a seat at the State of the Union Address.
Toshiba gets official with Portege G910, G710 and G450 phones
Hoverit’s Lounger, the magnetically levitating acrylic chaise
Sorry Joan Rivers, Hoverit Lounger is officially sliding into the pole position for the most hideously awkward looking piece of plastic flittering around, although we’ll totally understand if you want to envy its defiance of gravity above all else. No solid plans for price or production, but really, who’s rushing to sit in this thing? We get that it’s clear to prove there are no tricks up the Lounger’s sleeves, but that’s kind of like over-explaining a joke that wasn’t even funny to begin with. Do yourself a favor — sit on your hardwood floor, it’s free and looks totally Boho.
JAKKS Pacific announces EyeClops BioniCam portable microscope
MacBook Air processor situation gets explained
Vista successor rumored to be on track for 2009 release
Bug Labs announces WiFi-free Hiro P BUGbase
How would you change Everex’s $199 gPC?
Although it was (and still is, really) astoundingly easy to simply point the finger and laugh at Everex’s completely unsightly, totally underwhelming TC2502 gPC just months ago, it appears that this thing may actually have a chance at gaining a wee (keyword: wee) amount of steam in the desktop market. Shortly after finding its way to Wal-Mart shelves, the box sold out — a feat few surmised would actually take place. Furthermore, it seems to have sparked, or at least been the poster child of, a quiet revolution of ultra-cheap, open source-based machines, tagging along with the likes of Asus’ Eee PC, Shuttle’s KPC and the recently announced Linux PC from Mirus Innovations.
Bluepod Media brings Bluetooth to football stadiums
Movie Gadget Friday and Blade Runner return!
Ariel Waldman contributes Movie Gadget Friday, where she highlights the lovable and lame gadgets from the world of cinema.
To warmly welcome back an old Engadget classic, Movie Gadget Friday, we figured it might also be best to take a second look at a staff favorite also recently revived. Three years ago we analyzed the dystopian sci-fi sexiness of the Voight-Kampff and Esper machines, but just as we watched Blade Runner: The Final Cut again for the first time (now on remastered DVD, HD-DVD, and Blu-ray), we’re taking a deeper look at a few more of the film’s off-the-beaten-path devices.
Numark’s TTi turntable transfers vinyl to iPod sans a PC
Teclast’s M30 PMP is mildly attractive, mostly lackluster
Truth be told, Teclast’s M30 seems be to a real looker at first, but we’re knocking off a few style points due the complete absence of originality. All it takes is a simple glance at the unit’s predecessors to realize that the outfit isn’t exactly going out on any limbs to innovate. Nevertheless, those still interested can look forward to a 2.8-inch 320 x 240 AMOLED display, USB 2.0 connectivity, FM tuner / recorder and support for AVI, RM, RMVB, BMP, MP3, JPEG and GIF file formats. Thankfully, the mediocrity is met with a suitable price tag — just $69 for the 2GB model and $82 for the 4GB edition.
Garmin’s pricey nuvi 850 shows up fashionably late
Fujitsu’s LOOX U50XN now configurable with 64GB SSD
Fujitsu’s marvelously light LOOX U50XN — better known as the U810 here in the States — just keeps getting better. Apparently, to-be owners in Japan can now snag one with an oh-so-coveted 64GB SSD, though all the other specs look to remain identical to what we’ve already seen. ‘Course, adding such a fine piece of hardware won’t come cheap — as a matter of fact, you’ll be forced to cough up an extra ¥95,000 ($887) for the privilege. Oh, and the unconfirmed word on the street has the new drive option coming stateside in March, but don’t bet the farm on that just yet, alright?
Inventec’s UMPC 7-A and 5-D get pictured
Palm’s Vista-compatible Desktop 6.2 arrives woefully late
Hackers reportedly targeting cities’ power systems
DLO’s iBoom JukeBox mildly resembles an igloo
Exploding ThinkPad attacks man, burns through bed
We’re fairly certain this BoringTrash fellow’s statement that his IBM ThinkPad R50e “tried to kill” him is a bit unfair — it appears to us that the R50e was merely attempting to get him out of the way so that it could completely devour his bed. The best part of it all is that the three-year-old exploding laptop still works when plugged into an external monitor, but BoringTrash is keeping this one away from from mattresses for the time being.